Tuesday, May 7, 2013

"The Package"

Once upon a time a lady invited a friend over for a play date. This friend like so many others was oblivious to the secret life of the lady and her seemingly gentle and sweet husband.

This friend brought her children over to play and as she walks in the door, says oh you have a package.



All color drained from the lady's face, having a good idea what this package contained. She took it from her friends hands and nonchalantly set it on the table. After all scouring it for shipping labels or content information might look somewhat awkward...

The moment the friend and her children left, the lady attacked the package, searching for any sign of telling and horribly humiliating information.

It had the contents listed!

Thankfully, even if this friend read it, I doubt she had any idea what these "two leather hand crafted items from the UK" were to be used for...

The lady knew and her bottom knew...and if it didn't ... It found out last night so the kind gentle mannered husband could "try out" his new "craft items."

The lady thinks her friends should warn their friends about such things...

The lady assured her gentle kind husband now the strap wielding HoH, that straps were only for TERRIBLE horrible no good very bad offenses....would any of said friends like to confirm that for the lady and her strap wielding HoH? She feels there is power in numbers...

23 comments:

  1. Interesting. I just receive a package that sounds EXACTLY like that in the mail the other day. Let me know how it works out for 'your friend'

    willie

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    1. She hopes to have nothing develop with it for a long time to come! ;)

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  2. Yeep! I get embarrassed if I have underwear delivered and someone picks it up hahaha. My face would have been cherry red!

    And I can't say from personal experience that straps are only terrible horrible no good very bad offenses, because my HoH hasn't yet discovered those, or chooses to ignore them....but the thought alone terrifies my bottom!!

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    1. Hope you both stay ignorant about it for a long time to come! ;)

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  3. I concur!!! I haven't had any packages delivered but I concur that the contents should only be used for extreme naughtiness!!!! ;)

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    1. Thanks! I'll be sure to let SC know! ;)

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  4. Oh my!!! Thank goodness the package didn't list specific leather items! Good for you for keeping yourself together- I would have been mortified and so distracted!!!

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    1. Seriously! I was freaked! Ha!

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  5. OH Oh! That would kill me. I coudln't leave it sitting there on the table.

    Callie

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    1. Hiding it under the cabinet wouldn't have look suspicious at all.... Hahahah

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  6. I would have opened it right away... Company or not. JUST KIDDING! LOL

    I gave you my thoughts on a strap already - ONLY for very serios offences! That way, hopefully you'll never have to see it again!

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    1. Thankfully my HoH takes what you say into consideration! ;) lucky me! Lol thanks!

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    2. Lol. Can you imagine that guests face?!? Ha!

      Thankfully my HoH takes your thoughts into consideration...lucky me! Lol

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  7. Not that I know from personal experience, but I would have to agree that a strap should be reserved for only the worst of the worst. Hope you can convince your HoH of that! Oh sorry, I meant I hope *your friend* can, lol!

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  8. Once upon a time, my mom called to tell me I had a package. She wanted to know what was in the box. Seems it was sent to her address rather than mine. Horror of horrors!!!

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    1. OH.MY.WORD.!!! Knowing my parents they would open it..or at the very least ask what it is! Agh! I would die!!!

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  9. Yikesss. I would have been bright red, lol. I'm glad it wasn't something obvious though, i'm sure to her it just looked like a plain ole package.

    I for one, agree with you about the strap. It should be put away and only used for the worst offenses lol .. that thing stingssss!

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    1. Grateful it looked "Normal" lol! And I am sensing a pattern about that strap....

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  10. oh God lol I would die even knowing that my friend held the package in her hand. HAHA Thank God she didn't want you to open it!!

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    1. I know right?!? What in the world would I have said if she asked?!? Agh!!!

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  11. The strap....aaaaaaaagh.

    A package such as that should be "accidentally" lost in the mail. Tsk tsk.

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    1. Seriously Stormy! If there had been any way to do that without sabotoshing our entire trust relationship... Lol

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