Such a wonderful word.
About once a year SC and I try to take a short vacation just the two of us-- no kids-- and take some time to get away and just reconnect.
I look forward to this long weekend every year. The time alone with SC is so very important. I love ... adore my kids. But being a stay at home/homeschool mom can get tiring...especially in May when school is finishing up. I was ready for a vacation!
However, there was a small hangup with this trip. We were going with two other couples.
I was nervous.
Normally, time away with SC is time to let loose-- be ourselves. He is in super H mode, and I love settling into super submissive mode. All of my responsibilities are gone, and I get to just let him lead. I love it. But . . . going with other people kind of throws the whole dynamic.
Like I said. I was nervous.
I told SC about my concerns-- I wanted to be honest with him upfront so we could do what we needed to do to make the trip a good one.
I expressed that I was worried about him acting "H"y in front of others. That I was concerned about acting submissive in front of others.
The first day was a bit awkward. He was over the top H'y, and I knew he was doing it on purpose to establish the tone of the trip. It didn't take long until we were in our room and I was being spanked with his belt...not hard, but just as a "reminder" to be careful. More than the swats, what really got me in line was the verbal role affirmation he gave me.
He assured me that he was very much in hoh mode, and that vacation changed nothing. He told me that while he understood the difficulty of being around others he expected my respect at all times and for me not to fall into bad habits of the other wives with us. He assured me that while in front of others he did not expect it, he did expect yes sir/no sir in the room and when we were alone.
He was in "super" h mode. And he knew it was exactly what I needed. This lecture was his way of setting the tone. He was going to be extra strict while we were alone so that there would be no question who was in charge, and how I was to behave when were not alone.
The lecture helped. A lot. It definitely got me in the right head space, and I appreciated his clearly outlining his expectations.
I'm not gonna lie. I was what SC calls "feisty" a lot. Quite a lot actually. But mostly when we were alone. And I got swatted quite a bit for said feistiness. ;) I don't usually brat on purpose, and I didn't this time either, but I do think subconsciously I needed to know he was paying attention and was going to stay on top of things. And that he did.
I did complain about his public "hoh"iness a bit...he definitely had a few over the top moments! ;) Like when he confiscated my phone the first day at lunch! Or threatened with a "do you want to find out?" another...and quite a few other moments...the implements had very little use thankfully-- and mostly for reminders. But really, we had a fabulous vacation.
It could have been a tricky situation. It had plenty of room for problems. But communication is key. I communicated my concerns ahead of time. He responded, laid out the expectations and made it work. We still got plenty of time on our own to let loose and keep the roles firmly established. And I was able to sit back and remain submissive even around others-- discreetly. Plenty of communication and clarifying expectations on both sides is key!
Have any tips for handling vacations as a dd couple? Particularly when around family and friends???